Becoming a “Joy Multiplier” – Boosting Positivity as a People Leader

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Think about the last time you had some really exciting news to share: a promotion or new job, being selected for an impressive non-profit board position, or even an important life milestone.  When we’re excited, we hope that others can share in our joy, and whether intentional or not, all hope that their joy is reflected when we express our happy news to them.

What happens if they don’t respond the way we expect?  Research from the University of Pennsylvania shows that the excitement someone has about happy news can vanish in an instant, just based on the way someone responds to it.  People of all ages hope to have their joy met by others, though few acknowledge the consequences that come from other people’s reactions.

Researchers have indicated four zones of response styles based on two different dichotomies.  The first dichotomy is their responsiveness, is it more passive or more active?  The second is their constructiveness, is it constructive or destructive?  The levels of each of these categories places us into one of four zones, each with their own set of reactions and impacts.

What is “The Conversation Killer”?

The first zone is referred to as “The Conversation Killer”, and is both passive and constructive.  Imagine the following conversation:

Here, the response was neutral positive; there was nothing inherently wrong or inappropriate that was shared.  Though with Person 1 so excited about this news, Person 2 barely acknowledged it.  Whether intentionally or not, this completely shuts down Person 1, and deflates their excitement over the news they had to share.

What is “The Conversation Hijacker”?

The second zone is referred to as “The Conversation Hijacker”, and is both passive and destructive.  Imagine the following conversation:

In this version, Person 2 barely acknowledged the other person’s excitement.  They simply moved on to whatever was more pressing in their mind.  Whether intentional or not, this slight also deflates the excitement from Person 1, causing potential harm to that relationship moving forward.

What is “The Joy Thief”?

The third zone is referred to as “The Joy Thief”, and is both active and destructive.  Imagine the following conversation:

We’ve all been there before – someone has shared good news with us, and we immediately see the holes.  Our intention is to help them; we don’t want this other individual to get too deep into something without thinking everything through first.  While we may have good intentions, the impact might cause significant resentment towards the individual sharing their thoughts.  There is a time and a place to have this conversation, and perhaps the exact moment the other person shares their exciting news may not be the right time.  When feeling this way, take a moment to acknowledge what those potential holes may be, and make a plan to proactively address them when the time is right.

What is “The Joy Multiplier”?

The fourth zone is referred to as “The Joy Multiplier”, and is both active and constructive.  Imagine the following conversation:

This is, in many ways, the ideal state.  The person sharing this news is met with equal excitement and enthusiasm, and fosters even higher levels of engagement.  Here, Person 1 is EXCITED!  When their happiness is matched by the person they’re sharing the news with, it validates and even boosts those positive emotions.  Plus, being a Joy Multiplier serves as a helpful tool to strengthen the relationship between the two parties.

Are YOU a Joy Multiplier?

This week, take time to reflect on your conversations in both your personal and professional life.  Where have you been a Conversation Killer?  Hijacker?  A Joy Thief?  Multiplier?  In addition, take time to reflect on the conversations you’ve had with others when you’ve shared positive news.  How do you react to each of the four styles above?  Take some time to reflect, and determine how you can make a more conscious effort to serve as a Joy Multiplier to the people around you.